A Happy Mother? Is that even possible? I mean a mother is supposed to make everybody else happy right? So what’s left for you? I know that’s what you were thinking mama. But it is possible. And it is a necessity.
These are action points for a system every mother needs to set for herself going forward. Me FIRST!
Pushing ourselves to the limit (as I have learned this year ) eventually leads to burnout but will completely remove the pleasure of motherhood and life in general. Funny enough these were my goals for 2018 and guess what? It’s October and I didn’t follow through with my advice and I am recovering from severe mom burnout and anxiety. So please don’t do what I did. Try, at least try & incorporate this action list into your daily/weekly/monthly routines. And let me know how it helps you!
1. Wake up before the kids, and fill your cup first
Most weekdays (I say most because my almost 3-month-old, wakes up several times through the night, so I have some rough nights), I wake up for our morning prayer which is now around 5:45 am. I stay up after that, and have a cup of tea, prepare breakfast, do some social media work and prepare my sons school snack. This way I have managed to at least have my cup of tea (which sets my day!) and then tackle the kids. For you, it may be breakfast over a cup of tea.
2. Nourish Yourself
If you haven’t already read it please read my last post, on nutrition. This is so important in our roles as mothers and if we don’t nourish ourselves, we can’t expect to nourish our family. My guest post writer Jalila Krichi, made some great suggestions including taking your B-Complex Vitamins & Magnesium. (This post contains affiliate links. Please see my disclosure at the end of the post.)
3. Go Out with your Children Once a Day
Children (most of them at least) always behave better when they have gotten some outdoor play. Taking your kids out, even if it’s for a walk to check your mail or around your apartment complex, will get you all some air, and you can come home feeling refreshed even if it was only for 10 mins!
Whatever way you prefer to exercise, whether a walk, running, yoga or gym. Try to incorporate this into your day. If it means you have to get a babysitter, pay for baby care at the gym, or pump breastmilk for your husband or family to watch your children while you go work out, do it. Exercise will help you feel more energized and stronger and help with those dreaded back aches most of us mothers have. See how I incorporated workouts into my daily routine and lost 8 lbs!
5. Create a Routine Board for your Kids
If you don’t already have one, create a schedule or an accountability board for your children. This will help all of you with any struggles you may be having with certain parts of your day. And Then She Said has a great printable to design a board that has helped us immensely. It won’t solve all your problems, but it will instill a little accountability especially if you have older toddlers.
6. Spend 10 Undivided Minutes a Day with Each Child
I took a course with Positive Parenting Solutions a few years ago and the one big thing I took away other than the amazing free potty training masterclass, was to spend 10 mins a day with each child. This will fill their attention basket and fuel better behavior making mother’s life easier. I still struggle with this because I now have 3 kids, but what we try to divide the time between parents. So Baba does book reading before bed and mama does something with the kids during the day. Check out Amy’s FREE webinar here.
If you have run of things to do, just put this song on and dance with the kids! This is my kids favorite song ever.
7. Know that you are Perfect the Way You Are
If you are anything like me you are a perfectionist and maybe have slight OCD. You want the Kids to cooperate, House to be Clean, Laundry to be Done, No Tantrums, To-D0 List Completed and time Spent with husband. This is not possible every day. It may happen every few days yes, but if it doesn’t please don’t stress yourself out. Focus on what’s important, prioritize, and do what you can or what’s important. If the dishes or vacuuming isn’t done 2 days in a row don’t beat yourself up because that mom on Instagram posted a picture of her clean, clutter-free, living room.
8. Ask for help
We are the Queens of overburdening ourselves. If you need help ask for it. You’ll thank yourself later. Don’t forget to thank the person helping too 🙂
9. Schedule in Date Night with your hubby
Marriage is equally if not more important when having children. After all, it started with you as a couple first right? Plan regular monthly date nights (if not more), outdoors doing your favorite things together to connect with each other without the kids. What does this have to with you as a happy mother? If you are not happy with your husband, it will reflect negatively on how you are a mother too.
10. Work on a project
That dream project you have been trying to work towards? DO IT! Don’t hold yourself back, don’t talk yourself out of it, don’t make excuses. Need help? Email me firstname.lastname@example.org. I have 5 Free Consultation Session openings for 5 mothers who are READY to take that step!
This is an action step for me in 2018. Even if you don’t meal-prep, just having a plan for the weeks dinners, can majorly help with time spent cooking, your weekly shopping and also save money if you plan right. Check out this post on meal-planning and get your free printable.
A long bath, reading your favorite book, manicure/pedicure, girls day/night out, a hike, a coffee date with yourself, or even just retail therapy are things you can do to care for yourself. Make time for YOU. Whether it’s every Sunday morning or Saturday night, arrange a regular time with your husband and or family to watch the kids for a few hours a week while you go do you 🙂
I hope these tips have been beneficial for you mama and I pray 2018 is a more productive, successful year filled with happiness with your loved ones and littles. If you would like to try any of the above please do comment below and let us know how it’s going.
Full disclosure: This post contains affiliate links, which means that I may get a commission if you use it to make a purchase. However, it costs you nothing and I only ever recommend products I use and love myself.